My mom is the meanest person ever. Like, she is completely evil. Today she handed me a big orange bottle of laundry soap and told me I need to start washing my own clothes. That I’ll need to know how when I go to college. That’s like forever away! I’m in 8th grade, lady!
Ugh, how do I even put this in the washer. Wait, is this crap blue? That’s kind of awesome. I could totally throw some of this at Cody and he would squirm. Ew, it feels all weird too. I bet doing my laundry won’t be so bad.
(Even through hate, Tide can make you happy.)
There’s a conspiracy that exists right underneath your nose: Gain and stains.
Now that you hear it, it sounds so clear and easy to associate. Gain works with the stains and doesn’t clean them in order to make you use more of it. In other words: Gain is in cahoots with your dirty clothes.
Stop letting this conspiracy continue and use some Tide.
In Focused Inquiry this semester, we did an extensive study of empathy. In the novel Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Phillip K. Dick, police use empathy tests to study if a suspect is an android. The empathy tests are of dubious ethics, using questions pertaining to animal cruelty as well as human emotions. But a lot of that test could involve things we all feel about Tide, like a feeling of home. Asking the android about someone’s childhood home burning down could help to figure out that they are one of the rouges.
While focusing on a detergent brand, I sometimes forgot about the feelings I associate with the clothes I wear. Changing at the end of a day into jammy pants helps me to think about all the things going on in my day. The fresh scent emanating encapsulates how I feel and lets me think about what I did that day.
Not all compulsions are great. My main compulsion is procrastination. But when I lean over and smell my clothes, I remember the house that raised me and the lessons my mother told me. This simple lesson helps to curb my distraction and keep me on track. I think that this “Feeling of home” could be used in a whole series of legs throughout multimedia to relate to college students.
Some may say that the need to smell like Tide could extend beyond their clothes, towels and sheets. What about everyday “Original Scent”? Say hello to Tide Soap and Perfume!
This eau de toilette has a real recycled Tide Bottle label used on it for nostalgia’s sake.
And of course, the bars of soap.
So imagine a clip, sort of like this one:
But instead, water-safe. Tide could give them away in packages or for barcodes as a mail-order loyalty program. They could also sell them separately These clips would help create a compulsion to clip your socks together so you would not lose them.
Tide has a terrific set of brand values. Tide invokes home, family and cleanliness. It also has a whopping market share. So why not associate other things I should use that Proctor and Gamble creates? For example, a coupon spread with both Old Spice and Tide, with man’s clothes, saying “Why would you put clean clothes on a dirty body?”. Associate the two brands and I’m more likely to buy both.
Most people simply don’t have to do laundry that often, and Tide has worked really hard (with Tide-to-Go) to make sure people don’t do it more, and that when people do it, it can be pretty painless (Tide Pods). But that causes a problem: Why would you discourage people from thinking of your brand daily?
Bring in marketing freebies: A tide calendar, perhaps, to remind people of laundry tips and tricks while checking what they have for the day. I really like the idea of a Tide-based rewards system, similar to a mycokerewards style system where the more you use the better the rewards. It would make people think more about it because there would be steps to make sure you collected something that is basically free.
For the Jewish holiday of passover, homes are thoroughly cleaned throughout in an attempt to remove all leaven from the household. I think that if Tide targeted Orthodox Jewish homes aggressively, they could associate the washing of all the clothes in the house with Tide.
It could be clever…Tide with a yarmulke, or Tide made out of matzah. or It could be straight up, Orthodox Jews just love talk of God liking things and/or straight talk.
Imagine a story of star-crossed lovers. Zoe the heir to the Tide fortune and Ryan a higher-up at Gain. In this fictional universe the companies’ rivalry is unmatched across industry. Over five episodes their romance gets tested as one of their friends turns against them, others betray them.
What is more emotional than a soap opera?
I wrote out a detailed sequence of events that would happen across the events, below is an image of that handwritten note.
What products do you need to have together?
Some cross marketing has occurred in the past.
Peanut Butter and Jelly
Salt and Pepper
So why not make Downy the yin to Tide’s yang. They’re both Proctor and Gamble products and are companions. If a conscience marketing decision is made, then a compulsion could be developed to buy them together.
So in my earlier post I ragged on Tide’s twitter pretty bad. So why not show you all the top Ten Tide Tweets?
Nothing more to say than they’re both solid “I lose socks in the dryer” joke.
A funny little snippet about stealing change you find in the dryer? I can dig it!
Man, this ad was the best ad about in this CRAZY super bowl. If it weren’t for Beyonce it would of completely stolen the show. Solid story, not too long, perfectly about football. You think its going to play to stereotypes at the end, but instead it just shows the wife as a Ravens fan instead. The tweet is boring which is why it comes in at 3.
As someone who loathes putting away their clothes, I completely agree.
“The tides are changing” Tide + Puns = Awesome
Is this a sexual joke about laundry detergent?
I’ll take it! I would love that dart board!
What a solid P&G en cahoots strategy! It’s a solid strategy and this tweet is short and sweet.
What a solid use of Throwback Thursday! Beautiful!
It’s the first day of spring! And because Tide Pods are “Spring Meadow” this is the MOST RELEVANT TWEET!
Art by noted roommate and artist Reed Price
Tideman! Solving crimes with his deductive powers and supply of Tide-brand cleaning products!
In a town that needs nothing more than to be cleaned up, Tideman busts on to the scene and deduces each case one at a time. (Much like Batman, the world’s greatest detective). His one weakness? He melts under extremely hot water!
His archnemesis is Slug Dude, a gigantic slug who wants to rule the city and dirty it up so all its people live in filth.
In this thrilling tale, Tideman runs around cleaning the city up-literally, while deducing his way through the case! Boom!
I have basketball on the brain. And there is an established truth in college basketball: halftime games suck! You never get anything too useful (mostly footballs, etc) and they ask you to do either super-easy or impossible tasks. We’ll Tide and I can fix that.
Halftide: The Tide Halftime Game.
1) A lot of players would be involved- most halftime games are boring because they involve but one or two people in an audience of 9000+ spectators (some stadiums hold WAY more). In this case, there would be two squads of 5, or 10.
2) Fun to watch. What the players would do would be a little embarrassing so it would be good for the fans to watch.
3) Good prize. Since it would be laundry themed a trial tide pod pack could be passed out to all of the established fans (who do laundry often) and the students (who, well, don’t)
In this game, a squad of five stands around the arc. Each player holds a basketball. In order from one side to the other, each player spins in place 10 times and then runs around both hoops (stumbling). They then line themselves up on the free throw line and make their shot. Each player does this and which ever team gets five dizzied shots through the basket first wins.
I chose this motion as it would resemble a washing machine. Like you know, Tide.
This morning I decided to apply physical Tide to making decisions, a part of what “cognitive” means. Instead of doing my morning routine well, routinely, I instead flipped a tide pod for what do to do.
Heads is pictured on the left, with tails on the right.
Most Greaterest Tide Pod, oh what flavor of coffee should I drink this morning?
House Blend (heads) or Ultra Dark (tails)?
Heads! House Blend!
Oh great Tide Pod of Destiny, what should eat for breakfast?
Raisin Bran (heads) or Mini-Wheats (tails)?
Heads! Raisin Bran it is.
My father, my Pod, how should I be able to see today?
Contacts (heads) or glasses (tails)?
Heads! Wearing my contacts today!
Tide Pod Sansei, what color shoes should I wear today?
Red Vans (heads) or Blue Vans (tails)?
Heads! Red shoes for today!
After those four questions I flipped the pod over about 20 times: It seems like it lands on heads a wide majority of the time. I probably should of tested that beforehand…
What have I deciphered about Tide’s brand? I found that Tide’s brand is a promise- a promise of clean clothes is a promise of home. I designed a life skills outreach for Tide to go along with their excellent disaster relief efforts.
The Tide Fund would work in two settings: high schools and halfway houses.
a) In high schools–
Recently, many high schools are introducing life skills classes to help actually prepare students. (I graduated with the ability to predict values on a normal distribution but without the ability to balance a checkbook.) Why not stem the flow of high schoolers who go off to college without any idea how to do laundry by having Tide put free detergent and inexpensive washing machines in their high schools? Laundry is a required life skill- we all wear clothes! Hook these students up with some free Tide on their way out of high school and send them off with good wishes and an Easy A. (And Tide could continue to increase its market share.)
b) In halfway houses–
Now high school is where most people in America begin their foray into independence, others have a rough start. What could be better for the tide brand than instilling in people who want to be reintroduced to the world that Tide equals home? Do a similar education program as with the high school in halfway homes, low security prisons, and juvenile detention centers across the country. Make Tide a part of their recovery and they’ll associate it with the time they became proud of themselves again- lifelong customers.
Doing good things can represent the trust I find in the Tide brand- and it wouldn’t be to bad of a marketing scheme.
Who actually wears all white? Our new pope of course!
Imagine that moments before the photo above (courtesy of The New York Times) an exchange happened between the newly crowned Francis I and those cardinals accompanying him.
Popa, what is wrong?
While taking my first communion, I must of spilled! The wineblood of our savior is on my holy robes!
Where is it? I can’t see it.
It is quite small, but I cannot go out looking as such! I must symbolize the strength of our church and of our Lord. Can either of you do anything about this?
Ah Ha! I have a Tide Pen to assist you, your holiness!
(As CARDINAL ONE leans down to help the pontiff, FRANCIS speaks)
The face of the lord truly looks to us on this Italian evening!
Moments afterward, Francis would walk through those curtains onto a new life representing the Catholic Church. Thanks Tide!
An axiom can be an established truth. An established truth I held was that Tide’s marketing team must be better at this than I, the tragically-behind tragic hero of this Project 54.
Problem is, I followed Tide on twitter about a week into Curiousness and their marketing team is very “plop”-oriented. Here’s five of my favorite Tide-sponsored “plop”s.
Now this is a plop if I have ever seen one! It’s a stain photoshopped on and off with a picture of a Tide To Go in the middle! It might of been a little bit better if they use their new stain square thing and made the ad square, but there is no doubt that Tide is acting as a Deux ex Machina here!
I find their use of trending tags like #YoureMoreAttractiveIf kind of funny, but just throwing a fishbowl full of Tide pods at the concept doesn’t make it good! (Even if Spring Meadow Tide Pods are the bomb)
An honorable mention in the hashtag category is this loosely connected to detergent #WaysToMakeMeMad seen below:
Oscar night! Full of Stars- its simply magical! So why not do nothing but add text to a picture of tide pods for the occasion?
Also from that night: Tide Boost in a supporting role- which is actually kind of a clever idea, I’ll give them that.
Now you wouldn’t think that it would be possible to plop in real life, but plopping in reality creates a twitpic all the lazier. It’s Miss New York USA with Tide Pods! Not looking at the camera! Look we’re hip! Please?
Now this here really takes the cake, there’s not even text to remotely explain how a fishbowl won a race for stock cars! I didn’t even know tide could only spin to the left…